This is how the week began
Life and entrepreneurship can be hard. Like messy, scary, desperate hard.
It can bring out things in you that you didn't even know where there. And I came to fully realize this at exactly 9:10pm on Sunday.
I remember the exact time because I was in my office - still working.
I had spent the weekend sending out interview requests for my podcast, building out my coaching framework and working on a consulting project for work. Which means I didn't play with my babies, relax with my husband, workout or anything else.
I had nothing to show for all of it. No responses from earlier in the week, again.
I sat there staring at my computer screen as an anxious sadness began to grow inside of me and big fat tears started rolling down my face. The bills needed to be paid. I looked at the long list of things to be paid and our shrinking bank account balance and I asked myself, for the first time - "What am I doing?"
I've never been a big crier but this was the tipping point. There was no turning back as my completely exhausted mind tore through the months of guilt and fear that I had been bottling up and pushing down. The tears quickened and my thoughts turned dark.
- You're selfish spending all of your family's money on this stupid thing
- You've wasted all of this time and energy on this - you've neglected your kids and your husband who need you
- You're making no progress and should just stop
- You're making no difference and no one is going to value you - take a hint already
And I decided that I was going to quit.
It wasn't worth it anymore. Time, money, sacrifices, anxiety, the emotional rollercoaster - it wasn't worth it. And I wasn't sure it would even work anyway.
So that was that.
I wiped away my tears and picked up my phone to get my order kids to bed, feeling sad but also relieved.
With the kids squared away, I plopped on the bed to scroll through my insta feed.
This is what I saw:
Someone not only read my email but valued the effort that I put into it enough to tell the world on Instagram! And it wasn't just anyone - it was from someone that I respected and who's work I greatly admired.
I also had a DM request to be interviewed on another podcast.
Small wins? Yes.
Enough to keep me moving forward? Yes.
And just like that I was back and excited about the possibility of changing the world again.
Would I have actually quit and let it all go? Not likely. But what I do know is that what was likely a small thing to these ladies, made all of the difference for me in that vulnerable moment.
The Week Ended With
4 sales calls.
A completed program outline.
Sales framework and survey complete.
A workshop booked.
Celebrating the wins - ice cream with my four VIP's and a little TV with my love.
what I learned this week
That I am not perfect, but I am strong.
It doesn't matter who you are or how strong your mindset is, we all have moments of despair, doubt and ugly crying. And we can't avoid these moments but we can figure out how to move forward despite these feelings.
This whole entrepreneurship thing is a crazy rollercoaster.
The smallest things can make all the difference. People do notice, even when you don't think anyone is paying attention.
The universe gives us signs and its up to us notice and listen.
Celebrate every step.
I am Grateful For
People who take the time to encourage and inspire. Thank you Dr. Michelle Mazur for your positive impact on my week and my journey.
The opportunity to inspire others and the privilege of being a part of their journey.
Have you ever wanted to quit?
If so, I'm here to help you keep going so that you can change the world and your life.
Tell me about it below. Ill write back - promise :)